The Emotional Eater: How To Stop Feeding Your Pain And Feed Your Soul Instead

By in Healing

By Ulenda Myburgh

“Emotional pain cannot kill you, but running from it can. Allow. Embrace. Let yourself feel. Let yourself heal.” -Vironika Tugaleva

What I’ve observed from most women is that their self-love is often tied into the way they view their bodies, their success or current circumstances. Most of us view these two words as a foreign concept. Self and Love. We can easily love our partners, our friends or our family. But what if self and love didn’t equal a foreign concept?

Our bodies are home to us and will be with us until the day we die. They carry us to perform the tasks we need to in order to thrive in this day and age. And therefore, like our most valued relationships, they deserve just as much nurturing and respect from us, if not more.

Often times we make emotional decisions, especially when it comes to the food we eat. But what if our body knows exactly what we need before we do? And what if we started loving it to health and not the other way around?

Below are 3 things we can do to love ourselves back into wholeness:

Ask yourself: What am I feeding?

Be honest with yourself. Before you pick up that next sugary snack ask yourself, “What am I really feeding?”

Is it a pain memory or longing, or are you feeding your physical self? Your body and your emotions crave different things. Emotional hunger is never related to an empty stomach but always an aching which is not yet resolved.

Physical hunger is not attached to an emotional urge. When we are not eating for our body’s needs, we’re often trying to cover a pain that can only be healed spiritually, not with food. Start to pay attention to the real reason you’re reaching out because awareness is key, and the first step to healing or changing anything.

Find other ways to feed your feelings

“If you don’t know how to manage your emotions in a way that does not involve food, you won’t know how to control your eating habits.” Ulenda Myburgh

In order to stop emotional eating we have to find another way to fill ourselves. Going within and connecting with our hearts is one of the most effective ways to accomplish this. As soon as we connect with our creativity something stirs a new world within us and our focus is replaced with a better activity.

You could start reading an uplifting book, writing, going for a walk or even relaxing in beautiful nature. Mindful meditation has a huge impact on the nervous system and stress censors in your body. No matter your outlet, it should be something that focusses on positive change and is rewarding to your soul, because when your spirit is fed emotional hunger cannot exist.

Connect with the healthier version of yourself

One of the easiest ways is connecting with that version of yourself you desire to be. She already exists in your mind which means this is possible; and she therefore lives in a part of you that can be tapped into.

Just as you would talk to a friend; why not see what the healthier version has to say? Surely she will have insight and the knowledge you need to “get to” where she is. Try this simple process of connecting with her whenever your craving surfaces:

Close your eyes and get centered.

Once you feel calm, imagine your healthier version standing in front of you.
Simply thank her for being there, even take her hands if you feel comfortable in doing so.
Begin to talk to her. Really explain your urgency to her. Let her know how mad you may even be that you are not as healthy or free of cravings as she is. Just let everything be communicated to her as you would if she were physically in front of you.

When you are done venting and expressing yourself, stay in your stillness and then give her a chance to respond. Just be open to what she has to say.

Then ask her one of two questions before you leave: “What is standing in my way of getting to you?” or “What do I need to let go of to merge with you?” And then, “Show me how.” Don’t forget to thank her.
Once you’re done write down any insights or answers you may have received. Remember, you may also receive insights only later on as ideas, thoughts or even in a dream.

This process has the power to not only connect you with your higher version of yourself, but to have compassion for the body you’re in. You may find that you start to treat yourself a little better and with more understanding as your food choices start to take a different direction.

It’s not hating your body that’s going to nourish it back into shape – hate does not nourish. Love nourishes. The first steps to that consciousness are awareness, compassion and understanding. Dive into what leaves you feeling good and be gentle with yourself.

Your body always knows what it needs.

About the Author: Ulenda Myburgh is an Intuitive Transformational Coach helping people find their personal power and teaches you how to live a soul aligned, heart centered life and live from your divine wisdom. Follow her heart centered nuggets on YouTube [], or for more information, find her at


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