If you ever argued about anything, then you know that a happy-ending requires the two of you to communicate until you reach a resolution where both parties feel heard and understood …so peace can be restored. Only and until you both get satisfied in some way, do you walk away with some consideration of peace. Or do you?
If you ever had an argument where you received no satisfaction from the result, then you probably know what it feels like to be resentful, angry, agitated, and discarded. But what if it doesn’t have to be that way?
What if you could be the relationship advocate, the champion of sorts? Would that be enough to allow the other person to get everything they want from that particular situation or argument, while you walk away with nothing but your generosity? Maybe!
What if you believed with great certainty that giving into one particular crisis could potentially lead to a completely new sort of relationship…because of that give? Would you do it? Would you be satisfied?
I guess it all depends on the topic at hand, but there will always be situations, arguments, and relationships that get heated, misunderstood, or go south, so how you decide to pursue the moment determines the outcome.
Perhaps you could decide to step back from one situation in order to get another. You can always try to make everything better, fight to the bitter end, or choose to step out of a situation or relationship, but whatever you choose, you are left to pick up whatever is left…the consequences of those choices.
Before offering your reaction, I suggest you sit quietly; not in your own thoughts necessarily, but to a place of peace. Allow the problem to be placed on a shelf for the moment so that you can gather yourself. Sit with yourself…quietly. Be ‘in the now’ by seeing the world as a whole instead of a small piece. Give yourself time; not to dwell on the tidbits of the issue, but rather the chance for the answer to come to you…naturally.
If you take the time to sit quietly, in the moment, what you find is that how you feel about a problem now, versus how you felt about it then, may be very different. When you allow emotions to calm down, time to pass, and tend to your soul with love and care, you realize that the smallest issues only need to be huge when you give them the drive of your emotions. After a time, you can decide how to react and what choices to make in the situation, but for now, in the moment, just be still.
With every action, there is generally a reaction…whenever possible, be delayed in yours.
About the Author:
A local author, born and raised in Cincinnati, Kim offers insights and guidance to those struggling in a relationship, and to those who simply want to improve the ones they are in. She has been writing and sharing for more than five years now; sharing her first book, working on her second, third, and fourth books, and offering up her seminar, Expect to be Respected, to inspire women to reach for the good stuff.
Kim’s book, Loving with Purpose, is about a woman’s choices; her choices in dating, marriage, with her children, friends…even her finances. Although the book is of a positive nature, the heavier topics of abuse, criticism, cheating, and religion are covered, too. She writes in a way that shares experience, along with showing a real passion to help women make better choices; as they create and continue in their relationships.
Kim writes for her website, www.Loving with Purpose.org and other sites; offering relationship and self-awareness insights. For more information on her class, Expect To Be Respected, or to connect with her and her writing, please go to her website, Facebook, Twitter, or other sites listed here.