Awakening from the Trance of Unworthiness

By in Mastershift

By David Zenon Starlyte

We live in a state of constant flux, yet we suffer with dreams of permanence. We are like flowers who never knew that we were alright; constantly searching for external colour and reaching for unreachable dreams. We are like blossoms that can never see our blossoming because we are too busy looking outside of ourselves; we never contemplate in silence our true nature.

What is the nature of beauty – is it veneer – or a quality of depth far beyond any surface level?

If you look closely at a flower; you will experience a deep love, a deep peace, and a deep acceptance of it’s essence. This is our nature as human beings. Flowers of the living breath, flowers of God and flowers of everlasting love. Inherently we are goodness experiencing itself. It is only our experiences and environments that could withdraw us from our true nature.

What is the nature of suffering – does it belong to the nature of the thing made to suffer?

The nature of a person’s life is influenced by a myriad factors from the environment in which he/she lives, his/her experiences and the intrinsic nature of a person. The concept of moksha – or liberation – is the salvation from the maya (illusion) into self-actualisation and self-realization. Liberty is always within reach; corresponding to the limitlessness of human experience. The warmth of being alive and of being an emotional being undergoing a variety of experiences; is essential to our unfolding. Moksha is not a cold experience rather it is a living experience.

First, we must face and surrender our fears and then we will grow beyond the “limited self.” Self-love is a perpetual quality that develops our self-worth and understanding. If we are not compassionate towards ourselves then we do not understand compassion. If we are not loving towards ourselves then we do not understand love.

Awakening from the trance of unworthiness, is the gateway to living freely and achieving our life-purpose.

Growing up in South Africa, I felt like a stranger in a strange land. All around me people were going about their lives and I was perpetually wondering where I fit in in the world. It was to be one of the themes of my life; understanding constructive freedom, questioning and reflecting on the nature of life. I was also caught up in the maelstrom of history. Events around us seem so real and important. As the myriad external shifts unfolded it was more notable to feel the shifts (or lack thereof) in people’s hearts. As a child, how is one to identify or misidentify with collective racism and racist policies? Growing up in an elitist culture, is one able to feel the suffering of the underprivileged? As an empath, how does one self-protect when around us there is discord?

As the country went through its trauma and started to rebuild it became clear that the problems were far more deep-seated than mere policy. In most cases the elitism of the past is ongoing and has continued to arrest the country’s advancement.

Sadly, unworthiness is so deep-rooted in the culture that it continues to cause a crippling pain. What surprised me more was to realise that unworthiness is at the root of the privileged class; who economically tower above their brethren. Why else would they hold on to their wealth with such terror in their souls and inflict suffering on the whole society by hoarding wealth?

The country is not suffering just because the poor suffer. It is suffering also because the rich suffer. Carl Jung brings this sharply into focus if one applies this idea to the collective, “The unfaced and unfelt parts of our psyche are the source of all neurosis and suffering.”

The rejected parts of a society cause a collective suffering in the ethos or matrix of the community.

Rumi encourages us to face this closeted wound, humanity’s shadow as individuals, “Don’t turn away. Keep your eyes on the bandaged place. That’s where the light enters you.”

At the deepest level we are Source Energy experiencing and becoming conscious of itself. However as human beings, our greatest obstacle to inner peace is self-doubt and a lack of self-love. I speak to many people who believe themselves small and sometimes wish to disappear. That is not what we are here to be and to do. We are light-warriors as well as luminous beings.

It is the abandoned and rejected parts of ourselves that prevent us from feeling whole and complete. They are in essence illusory, yet our belief in them animates them. It is our story that keeps them alive.

The first step to our liberation is to have right perception of whom and what we are and then to accept ourselves. Carl Rogers writes: “The curious paradox is when I can accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

The shadows are alive within because we do not wish to or we are not ready to face them. When we face them; we can slay the dragon. The dragon just asks for our love and in our love it melts. God, as the essence of love, is alive within us. The Divine is not separate and never was separate. When we love unconditionally from the heart we see all the misperceptions and realise that love is alive within us. That means we are beautiful as we are. It does not mean that we cannot improve; yet when we come from a whole and accepting space, it is the wellspring for future possibilities.

Embracing metta (loving-kindness) for all beings begins with ourselves. Loving and accepting all that we are, we liberate ourselves from the torment of not believing in or valuing ourselves. That is our freedom calling, and our invitation to experience more than we have allowed ourselves to before.

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